In my weakness and failures Christ is perfect. When I walk in my prideful flesh, I eventually will fall. I prove it to myself again and again, yet the lesson is one that I have to consistently be reminded of. The Gospel of Christ is my only hope. I was conceived in sin and possess nothing good within me, there has to be a substitution for my sin. That substitution is Christ. He bore God's wrath and made a way for perfection...not me, but Him...Jesus Christ. I cannot earn His love, I cannot be good enough, I must have Christ. Tonight I feel intimately acquainted with the sin that I thought was far behind me. Temptation rose up and I tumbled in, despite the path of escape the Lord provided. Here is what I know: I know that God forgives me instantly upon repentance, that He embraces me again, assures me of hope that can only be found in Christ, and then He holds me up with his right hand. The beautiful Gospel.
Nothing can separate me from His love. Nothing can separate me from His love. Nothing can separate me from His love. Romans 8:37-39
I stole this YouTube thing from Bleecker's blog without his permission, but God used it tonight to speak to me so I wanted to share it with all of you. If you do watch it, watch it to the end...you have to hear the words of Colossians 1.
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Like I said on my last post, I am living with Steve and Glo Gaddis. Glo has discipled me for about 2 1/2 years...our relationship basically consists drinking a lot of coffee and long talks. Those talks consist of everything from theology, to Home Group management, to cooking, to shopping, to husbands, to prayer, to tears, to laughter, and on and on the list could go. Moving in has allowed me to watch a godly woman 25 years ahead of me get excited about the things the Lord teaches her on a daily basis. I have watched her walk through times of trials and suffering with dependence and faith, and learned what the prayers of a faithful mom and wife look and sound like. I see the tears she cries over her children, longing for them to know the deepest parts of the Lord. I watch her serve the body of Christ through relationships with younger women and through leading her Home Group. I marvel at the way she serves and encourages her husband, and the way she gracefully tends to her home. The Lord had purpose beyond convenience and saving money in me moving into this house, He wanted me to soak in and imitate this God fearing and God loving woman.
With all of that truth said, there is also a lot of humor attached to Glo teaching me to become a wife. You see, there are those women like my beautiful friend Shelly that have wanted to be a wife and a mother from the very beginning. They were blessed with gentle and compassionate hearts, natural quiet spirits, and know from birth how to tend to their homes. I am not that girl. I have rough hands that have been titled as "man-hands" by some of my closest friends. I have pridefully worn my singles cape for about 4 years, and silently gloated as others prayed for their husband to come along. I cook 5 times a year...homemade croissants and buttermilk pie at Thanksgiving, ooey gooey bars at Christmas, and then a random meal here or there when I am feeling Martha Stewart-y. I ran my calendar with rigidity not leaving room for anything that was not pre-planned. That was all before...now God has blessed me with Kent and called me to be His wife. I have repented for my single prideful ways, and tried to fully embrace the blessing of dating, engagement, and preparation for marriage. I thought it would be funny to post random stories about God using Glo to teach me how to become a wife. Starting with entry #1: Wifey 101:
Picture this, it's 9:45 on Thursday night. I am tired and irritable from the previous 5 hours of moving Rebekah and I out of our apartment into Public Storage. Kent willingly and lovingly helped us in this move, and so he too is exhausted and hungry. We discuss where to eat. Options are exchanged, but no decision is made, and we end up back at my new/temporary home-The Gaddis's. Now from my previous explanation of the type of woman Glo is, you can assume that she has a kitchen full of yummy food that would take minimal effort for me to prepare for my starving fiance. Your assumption is correct...there is all sorts of delicious choices that I could use to feed Kent. I open the pantry and my eyes fall to beloved Cheerios. I don't ask if he likes Cheerios, I simply put them in front of him along with a bowl, milk, and spoon. Cheerios was my decided dinner for him. Kent quietly opens the box and pours the cute little whole grain oat cereal into the bowl. Just as he is about to pour the milk over the cereal we hear Glo yell from her bedroom, "you will not feed that boy cereal for dinner!" She gets out of bed, puts on her robe, glares at me, and then lovingly provides a gourmet sandwich for Kent. I sulk in the corner as I see Kent begin to smirk. Glo snaps her head toward me and says, "I've got two months with you missy. We will make a wife outta you!" Kent no longer hides his smirk, but allows it to stretch fully across his face. He was probably relieved his options for dinner for the rest of his life would not be me saying, "Hey babe, did you want Cheerios or Fruit Loops tonight?"
Class is in session for WIFEY 101!